Saturday, November 28, 2009

Sometimes the Dream

Sometimes we have the Dream. And sometimes the Dream has Us

Photography is one of those dreams many people seem to have. I think like other passions, its good to examine from whence it comes .. what is the wellspring that is inside that drives it. Some dreams are accomplished, then we can rest. Maybe your portraits were like that - unfinished business that is now complete. I know playing live music and writing music was like that for me. Traveling places - climbing mountains .. we do it till its done, then we can be content. We see to make it a lively would mean to take wedding photos endlessly, or to play bars the rest of our lives. Or to give mountain climbing lessons. We have the dream. We come to terms with it eventually. If we do not, we have regrets, and no one should have regrets. I vow to not have regrets.

But it begins to seem to me there is another category entirely. We dont have a dream .. A dream has US ... and it wont let us go. Thats what writing, planetariums, and some of the music I did began to look like. Maybe your photography is like this. It wont be content .. the tail wont stop wagging on the dog. Im not sure it wants to be discovered or to make it big ... Im not sure what it wants .. but it keeps knocking on the door . beckoning .. The only way to figure out what IT wants, since the dream has US, is to figure out what drives it. Where it comes from. Why this wellspring never runs dry . Again though, to ignore it is the road to regret.

Seems like when we have the dream, we can either achieve it, or at least come to terms with it. But when the dream has us, we are in for a more uncertain, but certainly wilder ride. We don't know where it will take us, this dream.

But I wouldn't let go.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

For It Is a Feeble Light

I am taken back by the garish light of day, and i am called gare-ish ..

Routinely I run from sunlit fields into the dark of my humble planetarium chamber, and my eyes cannot relate.. I burned out another projector led bulb today .. I come from light into eternal night and i cannot see my stars.. so I goose my projector up and up and up till i burn out the bulb

for it is a feeble light. that light of the stars

the past week without sleep have i been, yet the stars were absent .. luna held sway, bathing my victorian house in fitful pale illumination thru my floor to ceiling wavy glass windows.

even then the feeble light of the stars was hindered.

and thus it is ever so in my own star theater .. i must camp there in the garish light of day for 30 minutes if I am not to burn out a bulb until i can see that feeble light

that feeble light of grandeur . how we take for granted the night vision

and little realize that our eyes mostly are attuned to the grandiose lights of broadway .. the strip in vegas ... walmart in gallatin

how little we realize how quickly we miss that feeble light that is eternity. g